Despite my good friend Suzan's gift to me, I was still a prisoner of conditioning. The conditioned response in this dimension to 'death' is to ignore it , as though it is something that does not occur, or, if it does occur in your perspective, to create such a massive dramatic trauma around the whole thing that you end up completely and utterly insane, alone, and sitting in your home wondering why such a horrific evil thing could even happen. Alone. Believe me, people do NOT want to talk to you.
When your child crosses, you become persona non grata. You represent to them the most terrifying fear they have. It is amusing to me, now, that people react this way. You can see the look of absolute terror cross their face the minute you mention it to them. That is because we are all taught that we are our bodies. I know better now.
But, at the time, I still researched who I could find as the best medium that was out there. I research a lot, I was not going to spend over a thousand dollars on just anyone. My intuition (which I now know is the best resource to listen to, as it is connected like a funnel to spirit) , told me to go with George Anderson.
I liked his humble approach, his stats (I researched the University studies that he had participated in), and his demand that he had NO information about the person ahead of time that he was doing a reading on.
My skeptic was in full play, however. I gave him a false name, a false address, and an unknown telephone number before I had him 'read' for me. His readings consisted of him calling a person, and the person saying nothing but 'No, ', or 'Yes' to him. Nothing more.
I liked that.
So, I needed to access my son. I needed to know. That first year I had George Anderson call me.
Joey came through right away. Knowing Joey, he would not stop talking. He explained in vivid detail everything, how this occurred, what occurred, what state of emotion I had been in leading up to the situation, how he passed over, why, and that he was with his dad.
And, yes, Joey told George Anderson his name. Out loud. There I am, sitting on the phone, listening to this man say "Your youngest son...has passed on....Joey.." and he didn't even have my name or phone number.
And the details. The details were right on the mark.
I tape recorded both times I had George Anderson call me (always giving a fake name, number , etc)
The second time, not only did Joey come through, but also his father, Bob and even my second husband, Scott. I was more in tune with them by then, and I could 'feel' a whole family of people around Joey....
But was this enough? NO. I still desired. I still held on. I succumbed to anger.
Even as I say on my couch and put on soothing tapes, and attempted to accelerate communication with Joey by using automatic writing (which, btw, does work), he would write on the paper as I held the pen "MOM I AM OKAY GOD IS HERE!!! DAD HERE!!!" and he would draw the symbols for eternity and infinity and the words LOVE LOVE LOVE over and over again.
With all of this, I was still insane. Still angry, filled with desire and anger, furious at the Light, furious that my son, my baby, my love, was not using that body.
I laid on my bed, I tried to 'have an NDE'. I could almost hear Joey rolling his spiritual eyes at me as I fumed and screamed at the light.
"STOP TRYING TO KICK DOWN THE GATES OF HEAVEN MOM!" he told George Anderson.
Well, I tried anyway. I wanted to die.
But, then, I did die. Only Joey , and all of them, started showing me how to die. Even while using this 'body.'
next up: Joey comes to his brothers: : )