I had already been working quite a bit on killing off 'Marianne.' For a long long time, in linear time, she was dissolving as a reality.
For some people, it happens slowly..they recognize they have aged and that there is an 'end' to their body...they either freak out, or decide they will dig a little farther, dig inside themselves, and ask questions..
What Am I, if I am Not My Body.
Religion, for me, never had any answers. It placed the concept of 'God' out there, in some faraway place where it was untouchable. It was always a projection of an old angry male, sitting on a cloud with a scowl. OR, it was a nice man with a beard, his son, a very welcoming presence.
And I see how difficult it would be for anyone, with these concepts out there, to feel particularly comfortable when one is angry, the other kind. Which one do you access?
I dumped both of those biblical concepts years ago, again, in linear time, because they
did not work.
What was this 'God' idea anyway? who/what/where/
I have heard the near death experiencer's version of 'God'...it is outstanding, so far removed from the constricted boxed versions I had learned.
It had NO anger. NO judgement. NO condemnation. It was an all loving presence, a presence
that I belonged to.
Suddenly, someone said.."But we are all God, the Light, we are God before we label ourselves."
That hit me like a mountain crashing over me.
I am not Marianne, I am not my history , I am none of the labels so insistently thrust upon me.
I am God, and this is a play, and I am wearing one silly ass costume.
The props, I create, the scenery, I create. the labels, I create.
I created them and am creating many of them in many dimensions.
How many 'me's are out there experiencing every dimension?
I find it amusing that infinity must be just loaded with 'Me's' out there .
Many of the NDEers spoke to me of a 'light greater than a million suns..did not hurt their eyes'
and a love beyond their words.
So, I am not only This Beautiful Light, I am also Unconditionally Loving...
As is everyone.
Only, so many think they are their bodies.
The concept of a holographic universe, the idea that everything is a hologram projected from the 'observer's' perspective, is one that is being touted by many a theoretical physicist.
I look at the shadow of my body on a wall, and realize that I am as solid as that shadow.
My body is a projection from the mind of me, as God.
I am making a movie.
I wrote the script.
God is not out there, watching, I am God out there watching.
Everyone is God watching themselves.
God is too small a word, says Dr Eben Alexander, to describe it.
So, I am God watching this projection called Marianne having a wee bit of a play that has already been written and the cast and characters are in play.
Joey played my son, I played the mother. He is no longer in the play using the prop of his body, but Joey is the expanded true realization of Joey now.
I just have not woken up yet.
The waking up is occurring............
and Marianne Brown is "poof" . disappearing.